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The East African : Feb 2nd 2015
20 The EastAfrican OPINION JANUARY 31 - FEBRUARY 6, 2015 LAST WORD Woman ma≥≥ies he≥self, plans extended honeymoon in Cambodia, Laos, Dubai “Till death do I part”? Yas- min Eleby, from Houston, Texas, married herself after failing to find a partner by the age of 40. When Yasmin turned 38, she made a pact with herself that if did not find the love of her life by age 40, then that was it, she would marry herself. She therefore had her “wedding” at the Houston Museum of African American Culture, was packed with her friends and family. She walked down the aisle arm in arm her mother in a “spiritual” service, as it is not legal to marry yourself. She now plans to take an extended honeymoon to Cambodia, Laos, and Dubai later this year. Joachim Buwembo The g≥aduation season is he≥e again and it’s pa≥ty time all ove≥ Uganda! which, due to the increasing student numbers, now take several days. For instance, It takes three days to read the names of the 12,000-plus graduands at Makerere University. Today’s graduands would find it hard to believe that for about a decade after Independence, each graduand was individually conferred with the degree by the chancellor, who used to be the head of state. Now since the “democratisation” of university education, the numbers are so big that the head of state abandoned the chancellorship otherwise they would have spent several weeks conferring degrees. And today, there is a graduation party in virtually every village of the country when the season comes. Makerere has had its share of nota- T ble graduands this year. There was this 80-something lady who has been fighting to protect Uganda’s mountain gorillas for decades and was awarded an honorary doctorate by the relevant faculty. At a quarter of her age, weighed in the reigning Miss Uganda with a Bachelor of Science in Software Engineering. I also had reason to smile as my own (adopted) daughter was in Makerere’s pioneer class of genetic engineers and won herself an impressive Bachelor he parties are still going on. The public universities in Uganda have been holding their graduation ceremonies of Biotechnology. Let me hope she will re-engineer my lousy farm to produce higher yields so it starts adding to my income instead of reducing it. A few other graduands who benefited from my small support over the years also sent me invitation cards and I made it to a couple of their parties. I hope that before the Almighty judges some of us harshly for the not-so-large offertory that we drop into the church basket on Sundays, He first takes into account some of these other African “offertories” we have been making over the years. Anyway, the parties have been great. Since I hardly got the opportunity to apply the things I read at university three d e c a d e s ago —French literature and economic theory — I have finally started appreciating the value of university education as it gives us the opportunity to party with pride. The format is largely the same all over the country. First it is several weeks of feverish fundraising. Every graduand needs serious monies to buy the gown, pay the hefty graduation fees, buy the new suit, dress, shoes and most expensively, throw a lavish party with plenty to eat and drink. As the graduand delivers his speech at the party, there is the ritual of kneeling down to thank the parents for their support. At a couple of public and private uni- versities, there have been serious protests over the graduation fees levied by the authorities to finance the ceremonies. I did not hear of any protests over the curriculum. It was about the ceremonies! While closing the marathon convocation at Makerere University, the Chancellor, Professor Mondo Kago- nyera, warned the graduands against bringing more corruption into the public service – that is the lucky ones who will get employed. You would have thought it is the public service that is more likely to corrupt the young employees than vice versa. But this is not the time Illustration: John Nyaga to split hairs. It is time to do what we do best – party! May we get more universities and more graduation weeks in the years to come! We have ways and means to ruin your sex life… The Pope’s comment that Catholics don’t have to breed “like rabbits” has caused offence among Germany’s rabbit breeders. Pope Francis said that Catholics should instead practicse “responsible parenting” and use Church-approved forms of birth control. But Erwin Leowsky, president of the Central Council of German Rabbit Breeders, told news agency DPA on Tuesday that only rabbits that live in the wild are sexually overactive. He said those in captivity have tamer reproductive habits. Leowsky feels the Pope should allow Catholics to use contraception rather than resorting to misleading clichés about rabbits. ... This rabbit just needs to get a life A rabbit in Brooklyn has been trained to bring his owner beer. Wallace, a black and white rabbit serves his owner with a refreshing selection of drinks from his own specially made beer cart. The 52-second YouTube footage, which has been viewed more than 486,000 times, shows Wallace pushing his trolley, complete with bottle of beer, across the carpet towards his owner. Wallace, who has his own YouTube channel, Wallace TheMadKing, can be seen in a number of other clips showing off his beer cart training, among other things. “I couldn’t have done any of this if it wasn’t for Wallace, and he wouldn’t have done any of it if he was given a choice... or had any brain power to make a choice,” said the owner. Will Saudis give Michelle a hairy time? Michelle Obama’s dou- ble “assault”? The US First Lady pointed out the restrictions placed on women in Saudi Arabia as she paid her respects to the late King Abdullah without wearing a headscarf. It caused a stir among some on Twitter, where over 2,500 tweets with a hash tag that translates roughly as #MichelleObamanotveiled were sent on the day of her visit. He played the violin in the nude, now he wants to st≥ip the police An Oregon man who claims his rights were violated last year when he was arrested outside the federal courthouse in downtown Portland for playing his violin in the nude is suing the police department and others for $1.1 million. Matthew Mglej, 25, says officers used excessive force, unlawfully detained him and violated his constitutional rights when they arrested him during his free expression demonstration. “The man was arrested without incident but would not co-operate and walk to the police car under his own power so he was carried by officers and placed into the vehicle for the ride to jail,” said the police in a statement. According to the lawsuit, Mglej told responding officers that he was within his rights to demonstrate. His lawsuit says people were cheering him on and taking pictures.
Jan 26th 2015
Feb 9th 2015